Beautiful Curse
by miss mcGonagle
Summary: Gina's thoughts as she hides in Cain's quarters. Cain's thoughts in her last moments. GinaCain femslash. Spoilers for Resurrection Ship 2 and Razor.


_Okay, so the whole GinaCain thing is completely melodramatic and over the top angsty. But I love it, that's just who I am. The Quadrangle of Doom? Pure bliss. The twisted LeobenKara playing house plotline? Wonderful. The President/Admiral-have-responsibilities-that-are-keeping-them-apart-despite-their-OMG-meant-to-be-togetherness...okay, that pisses me off. But generally I enjoy the angsty melodrama. And when watching Resurrection Ship 2 the other day (after having viewed Razor) I was just blown away by the intricacies of the scene between Gina and Cain so I wrote this. I doesn't do the scene justice, but I did my best. Reviews love, btw._

**Disclaimer: all characters and dialogue found below belong to RDM.**

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Gina watched from the shadows of the Admiral's quarters as Helena Cain entered and began to undo the many buttons of her colonial uniform, lay down her gun upon the table, and wince as she felt the muscles of her neck and shoulder ache painfully from the tension she kept stored there. The hand that held the gun trembled in the cylon's hands as she watched this scene. Mere months ago she had waited in this same room, been present for this same routine, but at that time she had been the one to undo the admiral's buttons, to sooth the other woman's aching shoulders and to strip away the layers until the admiral disappeared completely and only a woman remained, a woman with needs, just like every other person. It was what made her human. And loving that woman was what had made Gina human.

But the cylon had since discovered that being human meant not only feeling love, but the emotions that could follow love; betrayal, pain, humiliation, hatred. Gina had been sent to the Pegasus to complete a mission; forming a relationship with the admiral had been a surprise that had seemed in the beginning to be an added bonus to the cylon's plan. But it was her downfall, because Cain had fallen in love with the cylon, and she was not a woman to feel things in small increments. Helena Cain loved deeply and felt the betrayal deeply. So deeply that she had done everything in her power to hurt the woman who had hurt her. That was when Gina realized her own mistake. When the opportunity arose and she found herself pointing a gun at the admiral's head, she realized that she would not be able to pull the trigger against the woman she loved, a woman who had at one time been merely an enemy, a means to an end.

Yet, months after that day in the CIC, Gina found herself with a gun once again and this time it was different. After months of torture and rape, authorized by the woman who had once made love to her, Gina was again faced with the opportunity of shooting Admiral Cain. Even as her finger danced around the trigger, the cylon wondered if she would be capable of following through with what she had come here intending to do.

The admiral turned and came face to face with the cylon and the gun. The redhead froze, her jacket only halfway down her arms. As a soldier, Cain knew this was her end. Her gun lay on the table behind her and she was restricted by her own clothing. The cylon was poised to shoot and even if the gun failed, Cain had seen enough of the cylons to know that the machine before her was more than capable of killing her without the aid of a weapon. She didn't flinch, but rather stared into the haunted eyes of the cylon, its appearance startlingly altered from a few months earlier when it had been beautiful and graceful and perfect. The battered creature before her was a far cry from the woman Cain had loved so deeply it had made her heart ache, even before she learned of Gina's true nature.

"Tell me Admiral, can you roll over?" Gina taunted as she raised the gun to aim at the other woman's head, using the admiral's earlier words against her. "_Beg?_"

"Frak you," Cain said coldly.

"You're not my type," the cylon replied slowly, emphasizing each word. Cain nearly broke, but not quite, her eyes filled with tears and she inhaled sharply, but maintained control, even as the gun went off.

Gina took greater pleasure in the tears that glinted in the other woman's eyes and the way she fought to control her pain at this comment than in the backwards jerk of the admiral's head as the bullet entered her skull.

The blonde stared at the crumpled body at her feet as she let the gun fall to her side. She marveled at her own pain at that moment as she regarded the woman who had once been Helena Cain. Even after all the abuse, all the scars, even after the pleasure she felt in causing Cain pain, Gina still loved her.

What a beautiful curse it was to be human.


End file.
